Many of us have probably felt jealousy and envy in the past: Be it in a relationship, in a friendship or in the world of work.
As the Austrian writer Franz Grillparzer once said: „Jealousy is a passion that passionately seeks what causes suffering."
What is the implication of jealousy?
One reason for jealousy is usually low self-confidence. Bad experiences in previous relationships or childhood losses can also play a role. How bad it may feel though, did you know that you can get a grip on jealousy?
Jealousy is a strong and often painful emotion. Some feel it stronger, others less.
When we feel jealousy, we question a person's love, attention and affection.
It's just like that when we're jealous of other people because we think they have something that we don't have.
So we quickly end up in a downward spiral.
We then react differently to certain situations than we would like.
What can be done about jealousy?
If a person is highly jealous, the partner may quickly begin to feel constrained. Constant control and squabbles can put a heavy strain on a relationship and also destroy trust.
You are valuable, and you should be reminded of that. You should know who you are, what you want and what you don't want.
Find things you can do well and like to do – even small successes can strengthen your self-confidence.
Be satisfied with yourself as you are. Nobody is perfect and you don't have to be!
Changing your perspective
Often it can help to look at everything from a different angle.
How would you describe the situation if you were to observe it? What do your friends/family say about this?
Stepping away from his subjective point of view and trying to look at everything a little more objectively can help a lot. We sometimes like to bite ourselves into situations until it seems like we can't find a way out.
If we begin to change our inner attitude towards ourselves and realise that we are great, strong and independent, then we can break this downward spiral.
Also, you should aim for dialogue with your partner. Words and behaviours are often interpreted differently from what they were meant to be. Talk to each other and calmly describe your feelings and thoughts.
You can do it - even on your own!
The fear of being abandoned and of dependence on a partner are also causes of jealousy.
Find your hobbies, build your own circle of friends and enjoy things that are fun to you! Even in a partnership, it is important to do something on your own from time to time and to do good for yourself.
So you can keep in mind that you can stand on your own two feet and don't need anyone to be happy! You can get a grip on jealousy like so many others and stop the suffering.
"Only you are responsible for your own happiness"
As jealousy can cause a lot of distress on yourself and your partner, you might find these tips against stress helpful.